A Reflection: The Ibaloi Wanderer in NYC, 1 Year Later…
An internal reflection of my journey as an artist.
It’s been one year since Move to Change Dance Festival in New York City. The doors that have opened for me since this moment have been many, and more of them are slowly starting to open. The festival taught me to no longer knock at the doors of opportunity! Either I bust through them or simply create my own. Mario the dancer evolved into Mario the Artist! The experience at Move to Change inspired me to take full ownership of my artistry.
Photo: Alexander Sargent
@alexander.n.sargent
This past year has been about putting my work—my art at the forefront. It’s a result of giving everything I’ve got into what I love.
Being in this stage of my career I’ve learned to let go of approval, and through that, I was able to fully embrace being an artist. I’ve always been scared of disappointing people, especially those in my immediate circle. I’ve longed for their approval and their love. Especially towards my dancing. Pursuing a career in the performing arts has never been a badge of honour, especially as someone from the Filipino immigrant community.
This past year I was able to realize this: By being too afraid of letting people down, I was really just letting myself down. I look back and I am beyond proud of what I’ve accomplished. The things I’ve done this year alone rival that of what I’ve done throughout the previous decade in the 2010s.
This post is about reflection! It’s about patting myself on the back and finally taking up all the space I refused to embrace in the past. As I type this down I think about my inner child, the artist who was constantly made to feel small. I tell him, “You’ll do amazing things with your life! One day you’ll believe in yourself so much that you’ll disappoint all those around you; finally you’ll let go of your longing for their approval. And when you do; magic will happen, and that magic will save you!”
My piece from Move to Change and Embracing My Artistry
Back in 2017, when I lived in Melbourne, Australia, training at different studios. I remember connecting with a well-rounded artist (actor, singer, dancer). I was a part of one of their projects where I did a bit of acting and drag, something completely new to me. After our rehearsal, they expressed to me how; through this new process, I was blossoming from Mario ‘the dancer’ to Mario ‘the artist’. Fast forward to 2023, I would fully realize that experience.
Freestyle version of my spoken word, “I Am”
Coming from the choreography community, I adopted a very formulated way of creating a “dance routine”. I would come up with a theme, or a story, and then later present it at a competition. The main goal was always to perform and entertain.
My piece at Move to Change Dance Festival was the first step into letting that go. Dancing to my own spoken word, where my movement is not centred on entertaining the crowd was a hard direction for me, yet that’s where my heart was calling me. Here I was embracing my artistry beyond being a performer and entertainer.
